I’ve been a mom of two for one month now!
I’ll admit I was nervous about going from one child to two. Everyone says it’s a tough transition! And, well, they’re right. Haha But I had thought it’d be the newborn that felt like more work but really, for us, it’s not! Finnley is a pretty chill baby. She sleeps well (as long as she’s with someone) and only cries or fusses to be held/fed/changed. I’ve never had to be up late or wake up early with her. She has never cried at night unless she was in her bassinet. Beckett on the other hand… he’s a little more work. haha. I’d underestimated what a close eye you have to keep on a toddler when there’s a newborn around. He loves his sister to pieces but doesn’t always understand how gentle he needs to be. He loves to hold her (and tries to pick her up- eek ) but when he’s hyper he can get rough. He also sometimes picks on her as a way to get my or my husbands attention. So I can’t really leave the two of them alone together which can make getting shit done challenging. Safe to say I wear or carry Finnley around a fair bit.
Beckett has adjusted well to having a sibling though. He cried a lot the first few days but now he mostly enjoys having her around. I’d say once a day he’ll ask (ok more like tell) me to put her away in her rocker and says “my turn” which means he wants me to pick him up and carry him around. So I do make a point to put Finnley down and give Beckett one on one time but of course it doesn’t always work out perfectly! I hope as Finnley gets on more of a sleep schedule that I can balance that a bit better. I swear, one day Beckett will wake up and just want to hold and love on his sister and then the next day he wakes up crying and wants me to carry him and leave his sister in the room. haha You just never know which mood he will wake up in! Although I’ll definitely say with each passing day he wants to spend more time with her and is more helpful so that’s encouraging. My husband has been home a lot this past month between paternity leave, holidays and then vacation time so it’s been nice to have his help. He mainly helps with Beckett and it’s been nice to see them bonding more (my husband was working 80 hour weeks for the last 2 1/2 years).
I’m not that overly tired mom because I do sleep pretty well; I wake up to side nurse Finnley and then we both fall back asleep. But I think motherhood is tiring even if you are sleeping well! It’s mentally tiring you know? I do feel stretched a bit thinner. I’m generally a very patient person and I so rarely yell but lately that hasn’t been the case. I really dislike the yelling so I am working on that! It’s not intentional, it’s just a gut reaction to Beckett being too rough with Finnley or I or to him completely ignoring what I’m saying to him- basically it comes from fear or frustration. I try to remind myself that it has only been a month and with time we will get better at communicating and reacting. We’re all learning and adjusting.
I will say that the loving moments between my two kids happen a lot more often than the not so loving moments and they fill my heart up so full! I love seeing them together. Finnley is absolutely fascinated with Beckett and I can tell she recognized his voice right away! I think she’s going to really idolize him as she grows and I think Beckett will really enjoy teaching and showing her things. Watching a baby grow and evolve is always amazing but I think watching them do it with a sibling is even better. It’s so cool to not just see Finnley as an individual but to also see the relationship she has with Beckett.
I LOVE being a mom. Even as a little girl, I knew I wanted to be a mom one day and so I really feel like it’s one of those things I was meant (even designed) to do. So yes, it is challenging but the most worthwhile things often are right? It’s the challenge that makes it so fulfilling.
Are you a mom? How many kids do you have and what was the transition like for you?